Sunday Mornings // Procrastination & Perseverance

I always joke that when God wants to drive home a point for me he tends to tell me three times. No doubt the devine equivalent of counting to three when you need your children to MOVE. Hashtag the most stubborn daughter. And it’s funny because as I’ve heard my whole life: If you’re puttin’ up a fight about something God wants you to do you’re wasting your energy — he’s gonna win. *sigh* nonetheless. I tend to put up a good fight every time.

And lately that struggle has been real. I’ve felt such a nudge in the last few weeks re: obedience. I won’t bore you with the details but basically I’m 1,000% positive that God is trying to grow my self discipline and I’m fighting it super hard. I mean can I live?

Thankful for his nudges, but unwilling to make any changes in the moment I’ve been sweetly replying, ‘thanks – I hear you. I’m not ready.’ (pause for laughter — who do I think I am?!).

Then yesterday Jacks and I were playing on the floor, trying to get that tummy time in and listening to a random Hillsong playlist in the background when out of nowhere this song hit me so hard.

I had heard it a hundred billion times (wink!), but this time God took his nudges to the next level and illuminated some of the most beautifully convicting lines. The nudges turned to a gut punch — you know the kind.

Later that day I when got into the car I heard it again. (This is usually when I look up and furrow my brow — any one else?) Then, as only He would have it, it was also one of the songs at today’s worship service. And that made 3. Loud and clear, Lord. Loud. and. clear.

How blessed are we that he pursues us? As frustrating as it can be for us at times, it is such a testament to his unfailing love, that he would see our resistance and use it to amplify his words. Over and over, despite our (many many) tempertantrums, he pursues us. Be sure to read the lyrics below – I bolded some of the lines that were particularly arresting, in the best way. I mean I feel like we could do a whole Bible study on these lyrics alone!

Hope you enjoy the song on this beautiful Sunday! (And scroll down for a bonus acoustic version by Tori Kelly! So pretty.)

God of creation
There at the start
Before the beginning of time
With no point of reference
You spoke to the dark
And fleshed out the wonder of light

And as You speak
A hundred billion galaxies are born
In the vapor of Your breath the planets form
If the stars were made to worship so will I
I can see Your heart in everything You’ve made
Every burning star
A signal fire of grace
If creation sings Your praises so will I

God of Your promise
You don’t speak in vain
No syllable empty or void
For once You have spoken
All nature and science
Follow the sound of Your voice

And as You speak
A hundred billion creatures catch Your breath
Evolving in pursuit of what You said
If it all reveals Your nature so will I
I can see Your heart in everything You say
Every painted sky
A canvas of Your grace
If creation still obeys You so will I

If the stars were made to worship so will I
If the mountains bow in reverence so will I
If the oceans roar Your greatness so will I
For if everything exists to lift You high so will I
If the rocks cry out in silence so will I
If the sum of all our praises still falls shy
Then we’ll sing again a hundred billion times

God of salvation
You chased down my heart
Through all of my failure and pride
On a hill You created
The light of the world
Abandoned in darkness to die

And as You speak
Where You lost Your life so I could find it here
If You left the grave behind You so will I

I can see Your heart in everything You’ve done
Every part designed in a work of art called love
If You gladly chose surrender so will I

I can see Your heart Eight billion different ways
Every precious one A child You died to save
If You gave Your life to love them so will I

Like You would again a hundred billion times
But what measure could amount to Your desire
You’re the One who never leaves the one behind

BONUS: Here’s an acoustic version by Tori Kelly. Oh my heart!